Well, that is me fucked!

Well, that is me fucked!

Sweet divine mother of Jesus, I have had the stuffings shagged out of me! I have never worked in a country where men are this good looking and can fuck like experts. I mean seriously. My pussy is sore, not from rough treatment, but from climaxing so damn much. I have never in my entire working life had this many orgasms! It is getting to the point of, “not again!” is the battle cry as I climax yet again under the deft expert attention being paid to my bits; by yet another hot horny hunky Norwegian man. Hell, even the short fat ugly ones are fucking sex gods. Lord have his mercy, I think I can safely say I am shagged out! I have had my reserve tank of sexual wantoness tapped. Didn’t think it could happen, but there you go.

Then there is the personal dick. These are the ones I shag for fun. Yes, even with all the sex I am getting from work dick I will order in personal cock for some fun and games. The difference is the mind set. I can turn off Violette-watching-your-ass-incase-the-client-does-something-stupid-mode, and relax. And lord have his mercy, these boys are just talented. I have had three encounters with three luscious hunks, and all three have exceeded this pro girls expectations of what the average civie man has to offer. Civie men can, unfortunately be less than interesting in bed, sorry lads, but some are lacking in so many areas. Technique doesn’t begin to enter the question, you have to get past looks, fitness or the lack of, experience, and a host of other issues. So to encounter three different men with techniques, I can attest to being well above par, in the space of a long weekend. Is in my estimation a minor miracle. Yes, I shagged them over to 3-day weekend in between working! Hey, what can I say, I can juggle like no other.

So, I will lament my lovely Vikings, and hurry back to the arms of Thor and his cohorts as soon as I am back from vacation. Hell, I need the rest!

Violette’s philosophy to life and escorting

Violette’s philosophy to life and escorting

It must be my age, I am getting older and obviously more introspective. God help us all. Not, being a religious sort, I am still spiritual and have moments when I reflect on things, and below I have gathered my humble view for your consideration.

No. 1 Shit happens! Would be the first tenet of my philosophical beliefs. Seriously, shit does happen, and it happens to all of us, but especially to a working girl. And the first lesson you learn, if you are to last in this game is to develop a thick skin, and do it quickly! There isnt anything that is born out more clearly daily, especially when dealing with people, read-men, horny men at that- that shit happens. Literally and figuratively.

No. 2 There in nothing you can do about shit happening! Yup, again this extends to life and escorting, when shit happens, usually there isn’t sweet fuck all you can do about it, except think quickly how to get out of the shit.

No. 3 Accept that shit happens, quickly! The quicker you accept that shit happens, the happier you will be. Seriously, you will come to discover that the Gallic shrug is your best friend for most situations. Shaking your head in disbelief is a close second, and just falling over and laughing is bringing up the rear, to round off this trifecta of things to do when shit happens.

No. 4 Control over shit happening.the quicker you accept that shit happens, and you have no control over shit happens, the less it seems at shit happens to you.

No. 5 It isn’t all about you!Stop taking things so personally! The washing machine didn’t break down, because it is pissed at you and wants to make your life difficult. The washing machine broke down because it just did!

No. 6 It doesn’t revolve around you!You are not the center of the universe! I know this comes as shock to most of my clients, when it is discovered that I am not going to jump through hoops, but funnily enough once they accept this, things just seem to flow so much easier.

No. 7 It’s too hard! just because something is difficult doesn’t mean it isn’t meant to be, your approach might just not be right for this instance. Change approaches, or perspective.

No. 8. Leave it alone! sometimes the best thing to do in some circumstances is to just leave things alone, be it an itchy spot on your bum, or a messy situation. Just doing nothing, when you don’t know what to do is sometimes the best thing. Difficult when you feel you must be in control, but it can sometimes be the best thing.

WTF? WAS I, THINKING.

WTF? WAS I, THINKING.

Obviously I wasn’t thinking, and that is why I ended up in what can only be described as a fucking mess! Yup that is right, me the self professed queen of singledom, singlehood, singleness! Whatever the damn word. Found herself falling in love! Sweet Jesus, it came out of left field and hit me so damn hard I was stunned by the brilliance and the purity of such a rare feeling. I had forgotten how wonderful falling in love is. But I don’t fall in love, I get hit by a freight train, rendered speechless and dumb. Left clutching the tattered remnants of myself, and wondering why I can’t stop thinking about a certain set of gorgeous eyes. Now if humans could just get stuck in this blissful state we would be ok. But noooooo, we have to be human and do something to fuck things up.

And I have a sensitive bullshit meter. Meaning I will not allow myself to be mislead by words, actions speak louder for me. I am hearing the words, but the actions are often more compelling and usually a true indication of the real state of affairs. Well, lets say, I managed to salvage things before they reached critical mass. Translation, I realised what a total flake he was and decided to no longer invest my time or energy in someone who couldn’t appreciate what he had. I feel like a Bond martini, shaken but not stirred. All I can say, is I think I just saved my self a few years of realising that I would have been wasting my time. Better know it now than later.

Thank god. So now I can return to my delightfully rational self. A good DOM session anyone? Queue evil laugh.

Stupid questions.

Stupid questions.

Client: “Oh, there is a recession out there, why is your price so high?”

Me: “Obviously there isn’t one in your household, as you can still afford to visit escorts.”

or

Me: “Develop a personality, shag your wife for free, and then you will save loads.”

Client: “Why don’t you do bareback? All the other escorts do it.”

Me: “Then why don’t you go the them? Oh, yeah they have all probably died of some disease, since encountering you.”

 

 

 

Yes, this is what my daily interactions with clients have been reduced since the recession. Fucking brilliant. I am losing the will to get sussied, and dressed if these are the cretins I am having to deal with.

One gent made the mistake of asking me to castrate him. And then he mentioned the price! seriously! I told he at those rates, I would pull it off with my teeth for fecking free, just to watch him bleed to death for being such a moron. Funny he didn’t call back.

This moronic behaviour is rendering any good humour or understanding I might have had at the fact that a client is having a bit of a financial issue, void and null. I am no longer interested in how fucking bad you have it. Seriously! Naaaa, try that shit with some desperate foreign escort who comes from a country where a 20 quid shag is the norm. If you can manage to pick up a phone and call me, be prepared to pay my rates. They are not up for discussion, now or never. If your household is affected, then I suggest you develop a personality, and shag your wife! Stop bothering me with you witless bleating about how fucking bad you have it. This is a luxury item, if you cant afford it, do without or save up!

I Am Getting Old

I Am Getting Old

Seriously, I have just had a gala weekend most WGs would give their eye teeth to have. I mean I did Belle Du Jour proud. Starting with the taking of a long and through bath, shaving, waxing manicuring, pedicuring, hair curling, and a deft application of make up that rendered my skin flawless. It took about an hour and a half to apply it just right, checking it from different angles. If I do say so myself, it was magnificent. Urban Decay-Glinda limited eye shadow palette for those curious.

The dress was Valentino, the shoes Louboutins, the bag McQueen, the accessories were blinging as should warrant the opening of a grand hotel in London. The champagne flowed, as it should at these things, I was chatted up by several rather famous and infamous people. I was in my element, holding court. This was Violette at the top of her game. I am now down to a dress size 36-38! And have been training with a new personal trainer that makes satan look fluffy, but that boy has snapped me into shape in 12 weeks. He was worth every penny. Yes at 6 ft tall I am now a size 36-38! So I am thin, tall, and fit as fuck, as the boys in Liverpool are known to chant as a mantra when they visit me. Even clients who saw me two months ago, have said when seeing me now. Bloody hell woman, you have one figure on you. The ego is boosted. I should be feeling beautiful, fine, and ready to take on the world? Right?

Then why am I so fucking bored with it all? Seriously, have I become so jaded, that gala events with international famous people, now leave me yawning and desperate for a pair of pink fuzzy slippers? Or is it that I am getting old? I just don’t understand the sudden dissatisfaction with the status quo. Mind you I am loving the new fit and toned bod. No carbs pass my lips now, nor sugar, occasionally a bit of fruit, but that is about once a week. So, my muscle mass is lean, my ass is still perky(after the deep squats, that bastard of a personal trainer makes me do.), but hey I will always have that. The rest of me is trim, toned and tidy.

I think my overall problem is that I have actually been working too damn hard! Thus the dissatisfaction with the current situation. Another reason why I am not really touring in Ireland anymore. Way too much like hard work. Seriously, the fun is gone, it is too much stress, for too little gain. Thus the new trimmer, leaner, meaner, and seriously higher priced Violette. I am over renting myself out by the hour. It is gruelling. But when the money was brilliant, I was up for it all. Now with clients calling and bargaining! No thank you, I will take myself off to other climes more suitable to my temperament, and bank balance.

Designer Premiers

Designer Premiers

I currently find myself in Belfast at the same time that the Marni collaboration with H&M is premiering. Oh gosh, those silk dresses look divine, and oh the accessories are delicious. So, at 6 this morning I am up, showered, bag packed, breakfasted, cab ordered, H&M please. It is now 7:30 at this time, and I am going to be in the coveted group of shoppers, the ones who are in that 9:10-9:20 time slot. The holy grail of time slots that a girl would kill for at a premier of a designer collection. I am excited, my heart is beating, my mouth is dry. I arrive at the H&M store, at 7:40 on the dot, and there is no one in front of the store! Am I at the right store. Yes, I am  the collection is in the window. WTF is everyone? Don’t they grasp that this is a designer collection premier? Nope, not in Belfast. Ok Bloody hell what am I to do now? I am not standing in front of that store like the lone idiot with no call. So I scuttle off to Starbucks for a Tall Soya Spicy vanilla latte, with whip cream. I will need my energy. This is designer premier shopping, there will be queues! Right? No! I returned at the rather civilised time of 8:30, there were a few ladies in line. All of us were in the coveted red arm band group. Quite comfortably in time to get our hands on all the sizes we wanted. It was almost anti climatic. Until they took the barrier down, and all those little civilised Belfast ladies turned into hopping demons. There wasn’t much hair pulling, but it was exciting trying to get the few accessories and exchanging sizes with people.

Items purchased:

Long silk print dress

white duo bracelet set

flower necklace

triple strand necklace in red

bracelet in red and white with strass

earrings red and green clip on

large black necklace

striped leggings

cotton ethnic print  top

All in all a very satisfying morning of shopping. Sighs with contentment and goes off to play with new items.